What do you do when a colleague you do not particularly like insists on taking you for a farewell lunch, gives you nice farewell gift and proceeds to tell you what a great help to her you have been through all these years.

You stay silent. At least for a while. Concentrate on food. Then smile shiftily (remembering all those bitching sessions that centred around her) and say...oh no...c'mon...I did nothing.

And feel like a total fraud.

Life should be easy. You should have some memory box in your head with easy to operate buttons and depending on the mood of the person or the moment just press start the required memories.

You'd look funny of course but that's quite another matter.