Was watching the TV report on Bombay High Court's verdict going against Niketa Mehta just now. Don't want to talk about whether it is right or wrong, ethical or unethical, because honestly, I'm not the one facing the dilemma and it is so damn easy to pass judgements when you aren't. And this is a difficult one, isn't it. Here's a couple who are being honest. Very bravely I think.
Yet, when I first heard of the case, I did think that it wasn't right in my 'smug-parent-who's-never-had-to-face-such-a-problem-touchwood' manner.Because 24 months is almost half the pregnancy over.
Then I read this and thought of a special child in A's school. Her mother had once told me how on bleak days, she forces herself to smile by staring foolishly into the mirror. But had she known during the pregnancy would she have aborted? Her daughter may not be able to speak coherent sentences or do a simple puzzle but is the most wonderful, well behaved child I have seen.
I pray to God Mehta's baby is born healthy and leads a good life. I can only imagine how tough getting through the pregnancy must be for her, knowing fully well that her child is going to have serious health problems because let's face it, every parent wants a healthy kid. But there's one thing I've been thinking about. Now that the case is out in the open, being debated in the media and recorded for posterity on the internet, what impact would it have on the baby several years from now?
As parents, surely Mehta and her husband will do everything in their power to shield their child but if the child ever learns of the case to abort, what kind of an impact would that have on its mind?
It's a scary thought.
14 comments:
First thought that we-in-the-media had.
Hope we're not so story-hungry that we ever bring it up again.
Kahini
My thoughts too. I've been grappling with this since the case came into the limelight. My parents wanted to abort when they discovered my mother was pregnant with bro. Nobody has ever told him this but I'm sure somewhere he knows...
Subs
Its a very sensitive topic.. but I would somehow go with Nikita.. on one hand, its not ethical.. on one hand its practical.. sigh what a difficult decision..
This post reminded me of that movie where a cripple wants euthanasia and how he gets the court to rule for him.. very intense movie.. raises thoughts in mind.. I forgot the name of the movie..
Pallavi: Yes it's very sensitive and a very difficult decision. It is in every sense practical, you're right...but there's also a huge 'what if' factor. Anyway, I hope everythng works out alright for her.
Subs: Yes, you always wonder about these things. I went through a phase in the pregnancy when I was very short tempered, angry at having to leave job, move etc and sometimes if I see a streak of anger in A I always think of that time.
Kahini: Yes I hope so too.
yeah i wrote about that.. .btw - its 26 weeks not months :) that would be a looong pregnancy.
- haan wrote about that angle - what will the kid think. and in this day and age every child will know what his parents thought! particularly mine!
btw - i think you mean 26 weeks not months. that would be one long tiring pregnancy :D
This is one point that you have thought of - What if the child learns of this intent of abortion by the parents?
My other question is now will any sane parent try to get it done legally looking at this verdict? They will turn to those shady abortion clinics now.
If the parents don't want the child, then it's better for the child to not be born isn't it? Immaterial of whether it's healthy or not. I know it's killing a life, but isn't it better than being brought up unwanted?
In this case, more so. I have a neighbour who has a son, he's 29 years old. And he's mentally challeged. He's perfectly healthy, so chances are he'll outlive his parents. Then what? Who will take care of him?
A whole lifetime of care, effort and a LOT more money than a lot of people have will be needed to take care of a child like this. How many can afford it, even if they have the will? And if they don't have the will to do it, why force it on them? Who will benefit from such a decision? The child, who's brought into the world unwanted and is already at a disadvantage even before he/she is born?
If the parents don't want the child, then it's better for the child to not be born isn't it? Immaterial of whether it's healthy or not. I know it's killing a life, but isn't it better than being brought up unwanted?
In this case, more so. I have a neighbour who has a son, he's 29 years old. And he's mentally challeged. He's perfectly healthy, so chances are he'll outlive his parents. Then what? Who will take care of him?
A whole lifetime of care, effort and a LOT more money than a lot of people have will be needed to take care of a child like this. How many can afford it, even if they have the will? And if they don't have the will to do it, why force it on them? Who will benefit from such a decision? The child, who's brought into the world unwanted and is already at a disadvantage even before he/she is born?
If the parents don't want the child, then it's better for the child to not be born isn't it? Immaterial of whether it's healthy or not. I know it's killing a life, but isn't it better than being brought up unwanted?
In this case, more so. I have a neighbour who has a son, he's 29 years old. And he's mentally challeged. He's perfectly healthy, so chances are he'll outlive his parents. Then what? Who will take care of him?
A whole lifetime of care, effort and a LOT more money than a lot of people have will be needed to take care of a child like this. How many can afford it, even if they have the will? And if they don't have the will to do it, why force it on them? Who will benefit from such a decision? The child, who's brought into the world unwanted and is already at a disadvantage even before he/she is born?
If the parents don't want the child, then it's better for the child to not be born isn't it? Immaterial of whether it's healthy or not. I know it's killing a life, but isn't it better than being brought up unwanted?
In this case, more so. I have a neighbour who has a son, he's 29 years old. And he's mentally challeged. He's perfectly healthy, so chances are he'll outlive his parents. Then what? Who will take care of him?
A whole lifetime of care, effort and a LOT more money than a lot of people have will be needed to take care of a child like this. How many can afford it, even if they have the will? And if they don't have the will to do it, why force it on them? Who will benefit from such a decision? The child, who's brought into the world unwanted and is already at a disadvantage even before he/she is born?
MM: Ooops...wrote months, did I? That's what happens when I pretend to work and blog late at night, heh heh :D
nm: Yes, that's also one more point, isn't it. Raises a lot of issues, this one.
Sonia: I agree. As a mother, my instinctive reaction is an emotional one with a lot of what ifs. Anyway. Very complicated.
Nothing is gonna change.The media today has become more cluttered than before and every spark of a news is turned into a burning sensation by he India TV and the IBN 7's of thw world for higher TRP ratings.
Its sad but its true...
Btw, I was just thinking. I said that if the parents don't think they can take care of the child, then they shouldn't have the child. In that case, if it is left to the convenience of the parents, then female genocide should also be okay, which is NOT (to me)!
So then, what's right and what's not?
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